Flirting with the opposite philosophy.

I don't like to dismiss other points of view without learning about them first. This is the traditional camouflage used by militant, social liberals seeking to appear open minded before they foist their lifelong accumulation of negative reactions to non-liberal ideas.

That being said, I will now openly declare a limited affinity for philosophical ideas historically labeled as "bad".

Prior to any negative response, I should also note that "fuck you".

On with the blog.

I used to have extraordinarily high blood pressure. Luckily now I am much better. I have trained and molded myself to become a calm Zen master. I have had occasional relapses, but I am otherwise able to impeccable control over my raging emotions. I am at times a little isolated because of it, but I pay the price for control and calm.

I credit my control to the philosophy of Existentialism. Many people point to it as largely therapeutic because it takes emphasis away from a current crisis and devotes mental focus to the larger picture. The larger picture being an interconnectivity and immersion with the universe that negates and enhanced meaning given to a current crisis. In other words, my connection to a larger series of events and my own freedom of choice in those events is far more meaningful than the immediate incident of a stupid coworker or the guy who just cut in front of me in line.

I credit much more to Existentialism than I ever could as a religious, church goer or my past attempts at therapy; self applied or professionally applied. Although I will concede that Existentialism could be a professionally built form of therapy. I will also point out that I find organized religion to be total garbage. You can leave your hate mail in the comments section.

Since Existentialism urges us to consider the union of opposites as the basis for understanding, it is also necessary (and an interesting irony) that I have on occasion considered and pondered Nihilism.

My friend Darcy has often accused me of being a closet Nihilist. This is very much a running joke since I am very much not a Nihilist. Nor would I admit to being one to Darcy because it would be very un-Nihilistic to do so and I really don't want to give him that kind of satisfaction. But I have flirted with the idea. And why shouldn't I? A lot of reactionary people would declare the idea of setting meaning and emotional consideration aside while declaring nothing has value to be socially repugnant. But why? I am free to do so if I choose. Not even the strictest of dictatorships could pull these ideas from my mind if I believe them with any fortitude. And on that note, does it not stand to reason that this could be the truth? That there is no meaning, applied or inherent? Despite all this, I believe in the apparent and relative existence that makes me an existentialist. The fact that I have flirted with Nihilism, taken her out to dinner and felt her up a few times only proves that my convictions are stronger. I have investigated my opposite and come from the crucible stronger. Can others who have written off the philosophy in a reactionary fashion claim the same strength of character?

Whatever the answer, my only response is "if you say so."

I have always been a strong believer in leftist politics. But recently I have found myself considering the merits of a fascist society. When I mentioned this to my roommate, he gave me a very quizzical look. As many people may now be doing while reading this. Give those looks all you want, but I can't see you through the computer screen.

I firmly believe that one cannot live through the chaos and corruption of democracy without thinking that the actions of a totalitarian dictator may eliminate the complete dickfoolery we have to endure. I don't mean any sort of Orwellian takeover by eventual discreet seizing of every free aspect of society. I refer to declared, directed fascism as a means to quell the insanity and greed in order to become a fully controlled, goal oriented, nationalist state.

And so those liberal minded readers of this blog cry out in disgust that I am some sort of genocidal, freedom hating megalomaniac.

I'm not actually. But I keep my options open to keep my convictions as strong as they should be, and a leftist I remain.

And so, that ends my thoughts for the day. And people can stop harassing me to update.

On a lighter note, Triscuits are fucking delicious...